Thane

What story did you come up with? That must have taken some creative genius.

I'm not sure how appropriate it is, but I do have some mildly amusing injuries which, in retrospect, I can probably attribute to drinking:

I passed out outdoors -- in nothing but my boxers -- and stayed that way until 2pm, when I awoke with the worst sunburn of life. The itching was horrible, and I had a funeral to attend, so I took a stupid amount of Benadryl (which I heard would help) with alcohol. The result was disaster; I fell over a tombstone in the middle of the bloody service and still haven't quite been forgiven for that.

While playing a drinking game in which you smash the wine glass against your forehead every time you down the wine, I did it far too many times and smashed it straight into my face, breaking my nose and badly cutting up my face.

Another nose disaster: I was invited to a posh opening of a new portion of an art museum. They served free wine, so I partook. I got very critical and disdainful of everyone and everything around me. A bloke confronted me about it, and I made the practical decision to headbutt him. But I was completely off, and instead hit my nose against his forehead. I broke my own nose and left the event with linen napkins pressed to my face and blood down the front of my very expensive suit. My girlfriend dumped me within an hour of that.

Well, I don't know. Laughing about it makes me feel a bit better, I suppose.

Thanks for the well wishes and welcomes.