I so obviously belong on this chronic thread.
No you don't. No-one does.
Don't take this the wrong way guys, but I'd love to see this thread closed one day.
I tried for 15 years - nearly every week I'd try and fail - definitely every week (and multiple times) for the last two years at least. I didn't give up and I'm grateful for that now.
I had go through a lot of hard soul searching to get sober - I had to fight every craving, fight every bad thought...sometimes it was just down to I will not drink today.
but I did it. It's possible
D