Thank you all for your theories on this topic. Moreover, you are right whether it is a disease, addiction or whatever the force is. The bottom line is can “ONE” handle it and I cannot. I know that for sure however my heart does not fully understand why my head is pulling away. My heart still is so hurt. I guess that is my problem now to try to mend it. I just do not think it is right that people with this problem abuses others so much. But then again I guess people can leave that lifestyle if they want to. However, it is very hard when you feel trapped…… That is where the line of love and sanity comes to play.
For me I just cannot get past all the lies for yrs of him telling me that he cares/loves me. I believed him and I do not how he lives with himself for that….How he was so sorry for everything he did when I found out and I did forgive him. OMG I forgave him and he still cheated. I think I cannot forgive myself for giving him another chance. When I forgive someone for something this huge then to have someone do it again and cross my forgiveness angers me so much. I even was up all night having an anxiety attract over all the memories of all the women. I do not know why I cannot let this go in my mind. I have had plenty of heartaches in the past and let all of them go… To know that he is off right now doing the same crap to someone else makes me sick. I truly regret the day our paths crossed.