sweetie, you're not an idiot.
I was going to IOP 3 times a week for 6 weeks, for abusing opiates. My 1st XABF introduced me to crack, and I smoked it the night I went to IOP to "graduate". Sick, but true. I was surrounded by recovering addicts/counselors and THEY didn't know.
You've learned a lesson and you're setting boundaries....all good things, so stop beating yourself up, okay?
Hugs and prayers!
Amy