Originally Posted by Troubledone

So my niece (meth addict) has been out of the workhouse for a year. She's back in jail now becuase she was using and selling.

So- she calls my sister and says that since she's in jail she came clean with her po and told her p.o. that she has been using for the past 2 years and just figured out how to slip past the regular UA's that they require for probation.

That means that she was never clean. Not in rehab, not in the workhouse and not since she's gotten out.

She did fail to come clean with the p.o. about dealing drugs, but I suppose and addict thinks that's just an irrelevant detail (sarcasm, sorry).

So - how big of an idiot am I? She's been living (sort of) in my home for the past year. I felt comfortable that all her UA's were clean, but was concerned that she kept dating idiots and people she met at the workhouse. And I was concerned that she could never keep a job for more than a day or two - and that she never followed through on what she said she was going to do. But she always seemed to have enough money (can I be a bigger idiot???)

My husband had been worried all along (he has a much more balanced perspective that I). So, I guess I should have looked at the behavior and not the UA's or what she was saying. One consolation is that her p.o. was completely taken in as well.

A counselor once told me that if she was not addicted, she would be doing the things a normal person does at her age (27) - get a job, save for the future, connect with family, follow through on commitments, etc. She did none of this and I kept believing her words, not her actions.

I feel like a complete idiot. I shouldn't be allowed out after dark alone...

Needless to say, she will never live in my home again. I am feeling some anger and bitterness. I can't trust her and I can't trust myself with her... so all I know to do is to give her to God, grieve my loss and try to have a life.

Thanks for listening. You guys are great and are a wonderful comfort to me.