Originally Posted by
OldPaint 
thanks for all of the advice. i know a womens sexual experience is very much different than a mans...and i cant even begin to understand it...thats why I was unsure if anything emotionally or chemically could be kicking in.
i know very little about alcohol having never touched it myself but i've heard certain drugs can stay in your system and be re-activated through working out or losing weight or vigorous activity. not sure if the same is true for alcohol or not.
thanks for sharing your experience as well. i have a strong gut feeling that she is drinking but i just cant see how it is possible. i have even torn the house apart trying to find alcohol she may have hidden and have found nothing. i dont know if im just being paranoid or not. im just afraid because she quit on her own (no treatments or programs). i dont want her to slip back...and if she is i want to catch it before its too late.
I know that can happen with drugs that get trapped in your fat cells. When I got sober off of meth 14 years ago, they warned us about it because ther drug can get released into your bloodstream and it can make you feel high and trigger you to use. It did happen to me a couple of times that first year. BUT I have never heard of that with alcohol and it sure hasn't happened to me.
But I know that my husband had a zero tolerance policy for it to. Wish that could have stopped me. Ugh, I cringe when I think of all the times I lied straight to his face.
I have know people (my mother is one) that have stayed sober for 20+ years with no program but I certainly would not want to do it and truly, IMO, my mother would have a lot more peace in her mind and life if she did go to some sort of program but it is her life and she has to choose how she wants to live it. I do think it might be something your wife might want to at least check out, especially seeing as you can not relate at all.
Sorry to be so personal but does she seem drunk while still in bed or does she go to the bathroom or?? I wish you the very best and I commend you for seeking out SR to understand. Welcome!!!!