Hey Girl,
It seems as tho you have a relatively calm household...considering. You might consider the fact that you have TIME...
You don't have to DO anything until you are ready. You could gain some strength through the program...you could test the waters. You could confront him at a time of your choosing and see what happens...and I'll bet that you will suprise yourself.
In my case, my home had gotten pretty ugly and when I chose to NOT react it was huge. In your case that may not be true...any change at all affects the balance. Even small things.
The fact that you are becoming aware of your own ways of dealing is a huge step and if you are in no way threatened or feel unsafe consider it a gift of time. Time to grow and get stronger and try new behaviors.
It's kind of fun to make a change and watch them react to YOU.
One day at a time,
Paula