Borntobe,
Hey Boss, I'm here for you. One day at a time, it works. If you haven't heard it before... It's the first drink that gets you drunk, don't drink it.
I really think to recover you need the support of AA. Perhaps you can catch a meeting wherever you happen to be. If not, I would definitely look into it when you get back. We're all just like you, no worries really. I spent a lifetime killing myself a little each day, AA is helping me to live again, you can't under estimate it's benefits in my opinion.
"Willpower tells me I must, but willingness tells me I can."
John