You keep assuming Lauren's responsibilities, she will just keep giving them to you. I know how hard it is to turn your back on your daughter, but nothing changes if nothing changes. My daughter recently told me that I did a good job detaching from her. If I had continued to be in her life, she told me that she would have continued to tell herself that everything was okay. Try something different. It will bring discomfort at first, but it will get easier the more you do it. I agree that Lauren does not need to be raising a child right now, but it is up to her to find the answers to that, not you. Giving her a ride is justified, paying for the abortion with money you borrowed is enabling. You are getting better with realizing the difference. Just keep moving forward. The next time she gets pregnant (and there is a good possibility it will happen again) let her figure it out. Hugs, Marle