I had the same feelings in the beginning- I didn't "fit in" with other NA-ers, I didn't like all the platitudes, etc. If I'm honest with myself, what I really felt was pride. I was better than these people- they were weak, and needed help kicking the habit. As I've said before, "Alcoholics and drug addicts are the only people in the world who can be lying in a gutter and still look down on you." Again, this is only my experience.
What I was told was to stop looking at the differences, and look for the similarities. I was also told, and find it to be true, that when I really don't want to go to meetings is when I need them the most. It is usually the exact things you described that make me not want to go- anger and resentment. For me, anger and resentment were very comfortable feelings- I knew them well, and actually reveled in them. However, it was anger and resentment that caused me to fail when I would try to get clean on my own, and even when I managed to get clean I was still miserable.
My choice to try a 12-step program was based on the fact that millions have found recovery with them. Not just abstinence from alcohol/drugs, but a fulfilling, happy transformation. I wanted that. I hated me. I have no idea if people can find it on their own. All I knew was that it hurt bad enough and I was willing to try anything to get rid of the pain. I figured in the beginning that NA was a good place to start. I decided to try the program, as they suggested (and in my opinion, "the program is just that- an all inclusive program. Meetings, sponsorship, step work, etc.) I've never found in any 12-step literature where it says it will work if I pick and chose the parts I want to do.
I know me well enough to know that I will pick the parts that I find the easiest, not necessarily the parts that I really need to change. IMO, change doesn't come without hard work. I have found that the longer I stay clean, the more amazed I am, and the more gratitude I have for the program. Personally, I needed a sponsor- I was incapable of being completely honest with myself- I didn't trust myself enough to do it alone.
I had proven time and time again that I was the worst manager of my own life- under my direction I had gotten lost in addiction, lost everything, attempted suicide, and plummeted into a hellish existence. I needed those who had done had been there to teach me how I could do it.
Again, JMO. Whatever you choose, I wish you well!
K