heya lovetolaff-
you're sounding stronger! remembering all the bad stuff helps us stay the course when they try their sweet manipulaiton. Good to have a mantra that is simple and reminds you "He will never change."
Equally important to empower yourself with a mantra that is positive FOR YOU like,
"I now create a joyful, peaceful future." or "I am willing to grow and change." or "The past is gone, I am free in this moment."
Peace & good luck-
B.