Update
Being the co-dependent that I am I was right on the verge of letting him come back and then my gut was telling me something so I did some sleuthing and found out even MORE crap that's been going on so I immediately told him NEVERMIND it's over - I'm done. Of course, he's denying everything but it doesn't really matter anymore. I don't trust him at all.
I went to a therapy appt yesterday and got an ok from my doctor to up my meds for the time being to get me over this hump. I actually slept all night last night and am trying to stay busy.
I truly am crushed beyond belief but WILL NOT be giving him any more chances from here on out. I have no respect left for him and he is trying to "spin" his lies and turn everything around on me. I can NOT believe I've lasted this long with him and his manipulations. I feel used, hurt, and totally crazy right now.