That is how he's fooled stupid, naieve, trusting Callie for 21 years.
I will allow you the naieve and trusting, Callie, but you are forbidden to use the word stupid
None of us were stupid. We loved, that's all. We expected the other person to feel the same power of love for us as well. I know I truly did, and was continually shocked when lied to and promised to by the addicts in my life. This is not stupid. It is caring and kind. But there are those out there who learn to dominate our kind, and we gain strength each time we learn to put a hand up to them. And that strength brings wisdom, and serenity. We can still be kind and loving; we just need to practice these qualities on ourselves for a good long while and let the other adults take care of themselves.
We are recovering codies, and instead of expecting our addicts to find recovery, we must focus on finding it for ourselves instead. You are opening up your eyes each day so much, Callie, and finding out the truths that fit your situation. Keep putting those feet out each day. That's the way through this incredibly difficult but empowering journey.