Please call the local AA hotline number I gave you via our IM conversation. They can arrange for someone to take you to a meeting if you are still drinking and/or don't have transportation.
If your father can see you start to get better, perhaps it can give him some hope.
You are still alive... and you have the desire to stop drinking. That's all you need to begin your journey into sobriety. My next suggestion would be to go to a local meeting and openly ask for help. I did that in my first meeting - told them I was hopeless, miserable and desperate - and ended up having lots of people eager to help me. And they did. (And still are).
:ghug2