Thanks
Wow, Thanks so much to everyone. It really does help to hear from people who've been there. I have friends that I talked to about this stuff but they really don't know what it's like.
I just have to keep reminding myself of the pain I've gone through time and again. We definitely do not deserve this. I always start out being angry then transition into sadness. It's good to have reminders that I can't fix this. Maybe I should read up on co dependence. Go figure I have a degree in psych. You'd think I would have put and end to this a long time ago.
It's also great to have confirmation that I'm not the problem as he so often likes to point out.