Ding Dong, Round 2
Hi all, i have posted on here previously about how i wanted to control my drinking. This hasn't worked.
I first attended AA the beginning of January, I went 7 weeks without a drink and felt so good. Then came a weekend away when i drank, i then went another 7 weeks up until my birthday April19 and drank again.
I felt as though i could now control my drinking with the aid of a local program. The fact of the matter is though i haven't enjoyed it. When i wasn't drinking i had a good peace of mind, had future plans and was generally happy within myself. In controlled drinking i find that i think more about drinking than before. I also find that i cannot stop and end up spending a couple of days recovering.
I went out on Friday night for a friends birthday with the view to limiting my drink, this just didn't work and i spent all weekend recovering.
I intend therefore to go back to the AA tomorrow night, as i have my kids tonight. I hope last Friday will be my last drink but it's a long journey. I am going to have to get a sponsor, which is something i have been reluctant to do but i think it's the only way forward.
I do not regret attempting to control it, i feel that this is something i needed to do if only to prove to myself that it doesn't work.
Anyway enough of me rambling, but i would like to use this site for support so i wanted to basically say hello.
Paul