chino,
she enjoys playing "the wronged party". You know my family didn't have to do anything for her. She knew my son had a problem before she got pregnant but she tends to forget that issue. The counselor even told her that she had the right to get an annulement(before the pregnancy) but she chose not to. So many of my friends say she is a big girl and knew from that point what she was getting into. I guess I was honestly ashamed of my son's actions and I was trying to make things better the only way I knew how. My son had a trust fund which I gave monthly from to her. She got about 1k a month......now that is depleted. The angriest I ever got is when she had two cars (1 my son bought her) one her dad gave her.........well, when my son relapsed she refused to let him use either car and he had to bike three miles one way to work.......and he was working two jobs sleeping on a friend's couch while she remained in the house with two cars in the driveway. My counselor says that was a demoralizing thing to my son and though it is not an excuse it was easy for him to slip back into drug use. At least it was his take. She felt he didn't "deserve" a car which also made it prety hard to get to his AA meetings........pretty soon he gave up and my dh and I talked to him and he agreed to go back to rehab. He has been there six months. Probably more than you ever wanted to know but I think since she refuses Al-Anon that as the counselor says my son will have a better chance at sobriety dissolving the marriage.......his thoughts not mine. Thanks for listening...........dixied