thank you for the replies.....I don't know how much it will help (reading her post)but it made me see things more clearly. One thing that hurt was that she referred to him as her CHH and that it seemed like the victims "never got a break" all the while we have been caring for her financially and numerous other things to make it easier on her. One thing that I have come to terms with is that my grandson really won't know me as his grandmom but more like the lady that "drops in" now and then and it isn't my choosing for it to be that way. She asked my son ....when was I going to learn you get "asked" to babysit you don't "volunteer". So with that I have backed away from her financially and emotionally. I still would not let my little grandson knowingly go without. But just to keep handing over $$$ to her and let her treat me like that really isn't goof for me emotionally either. And it did hurt for me to see her refer to my son as a CHH. That was tough. Especially when he has been in rehab for over six months really trying from all reports. He is six hours away and she refuses to bring his son to him or let me take him. My son can get a three day pass and she isn't agreeable to letting him come over to see his child.(And he owns the home she is staying in) Mind you there are no divorce papers in place, no restraining order and my son has never been incarcerated. So basically my son hasn't seen his child in six months. It's his child too and there ought to be something you could do but that is out of my hula -hoop zone so I'll leave it alone. Thanks for reading.......dixied