My dear friend Trish....You held me up so many times when I was down, I am sending all my prayers to you today. My guess is that your Gram's love for you is as fierce as yours for her, and nothing would hurt her as much as losing you. Why don't you ask her, just point blank ask her, if she would give up her freedom or her home or her independence in exchange for your life. As a mama (and a hopeful to be one day in the future Gram), I can already tell you what the answer will be. Start healing, baby. We are right here behind you - Love, Jomey