Thank you all for your posts.
Drinking is not the answer and I know this.. as I drove tonight to the liquor store.. almost in a semi-Pucking mood til I got there..hands trembeling all the way.. I realized this is NOT the way I want to live my life. No "normal" person has one little sad event happen and then can think of nothing but getting f'ed up. I tried to turn around on the way to the liquor store.. and did 3 time times.. but all 3 times..i turned the car around and headed back..talk about insaniity
I'm too far gone tonight to worry about.. but once this bottle of rum is gone..tomorrow, I'm gonna try to change... if only I could find somethng worth living for it would make it so much easier.