Its his recovery I have to remind myself
Just wanting to share today to process things as I prepare for the weekend. RAH went for an annual physical and during the visit his doctor asked how he was feeling...and RAH talked about his major moodiness and bouts of anger irritability and depression. So the dr prescribed seroquel to replace the low dose of clonopin, and warned that it may take a bit of time to adjust. I was relieved to find out about this potential new solution to address his emotional issues.
He gives it about two and half days on this new med and says its making him feel weird and calls the dr and gets off of it. I understand that finding the right meds is challenging and can take a while, but I am disappointed and frustrated that a potential new soution has not worked. (Personally I feel he didnt give it enough time). And I am particularly bummed becaaus RAH isnt actively working a program of recovery. That is, when he finds himself in a bad place it all goes bad and it takes a while for him to get out of it.
The positive thing for me however, is that I now have a "plan" for myself! When he shifts into his bad state I either 1) leave the house and take a walk or 2) call a friend or family member just to chat, or both. And RAH is left to deal with himself. I no longer stay in it with him, trying to console him, or give him a laundry list of what he could or should do to make himself feel better. One day he may take some steps to help himself...in the meantime I am going to stay out of the way and take care of myself, and pray that he finds his own way.