Negative Man Needs Help (Again!)
Hi All,
I feel like an idiot writing this. After 42 days sober, I started drinking again. Four days now. I don't know why I needed more "research" to see if I can handle alcohol. I can't. I feel miserable. I can't concentrate, I want to be alone, and problems seem insurmountable. Just a few days back, everything was going swimmingly.
Or not, really. I placed my work above my sobriety and stopped going to meetings. I stopped reaching out to my friends. When people asked how I was doing, my answer was "fine." I wasn't fine though. The outcome should've been a no-duh.
Anyways, if you're reading this and thinking about drinking: Don't! The person you are right now, no matter how troubled, is in a better place than if you pick up the bottle. I'm miserable, and I don't want you to be. Reach out to people, if not for yourself, then for me.
Prayers and good vibes are much appreciated. Advice is always welcome. Back to the two-week board for me tomorrow. Send me good vibes for tomorrow if you can. I'll need them.
You guys rock. I'm very grateful to have a place to share these things. Thank you!
-- NM