((((Tiffany)))
Honey I hope you know that when someone is in jail it is easy to say all this stuff. I hope you start meetings before he gets home.
I know all about the love connection and jail. I had a husband(now ex) in jail when I was about your age. I have 2 brothers that prison is a swinging door to. Believe me they will say anything to have somewhere to go to when they get out. You are scared for him....
We here are probably a little bit scared for you. You are the one who has arranged everything; you have moved away, prayed every night, probably given him money while in rehab, and worked to provide him with a place to live.
Originally Posted by Tiffany912
I had no clue as to what a serious problem this actually was for him. Ive seen him lose jobs, friends, money, his family, his home, and respect for himself... Hes broken my heart by hurting me physically and emotionally and by stealing from me and the people i care about. I hated him soo much. But it broke my heart even more every time he got taken away from me. It was his own fault for getting arrested. Usually violating probation because of drugs, or stealing to get money for drugs. But I blamed myself every time. Always thinking there is something i should have done, or even something I shouldnt have done that would of helped him.. About a year ago, he was arrested for the 3rd time. 5 months in jail.
To me this quote above says it all. In one paragraph he has broken your heart, lost connection to friends and family,lost jobs,stolen money and been arrested. All of this in 2 years time that you have been with him. Addiction is a serious problem. Where is your support system? Have you lost connection to your family and friends because of him?
You may feel old but, believe me you are very young. Addiction makes you feel old mainly because people like you and me take too much responsibility to for people like your BF. Believe me his addiction hears loud and clear that you are there to take responsibility so he don't have to. They know exactly how to manipulate the situation you are in right now. He is counting on your ability to take care of him so he don't have to worry about it. What you are doing gives him plenty of room to plan his next relapse . I hope you will get to a meeting as soon as possible. You need it in the worst way my dear. Don't wait for him to come home to do it. Go tell the people at a meeting what you have told us and listen to them as though your life depends on it cause it does. I am praying for you right now ((((Tiffany))))