I also don't understand why, if it's so effective, people like Britney, Lindsey and Robert Jr don't go there, and finally be DONE with it. Certainly they can actually afford it.
I did email the Father in law with a carefully worded " I love him, but I've paid enough" email. The AH has been learning some catch phrases since I left, "it's in God's hands now.." and other similar lines, but I don't think he's actually focusing on staying clean. I can tell he's still using, even talking on the phone. I do want him well; I just don't think that there's anything left in my emotional savings account for him, even if he "fixes it".
That may change after he gets it together- who knows? He says he's going to get clean, then ask me to renew our vows. I didn't tell him that the very thought makes me cringe- I can't feature it right now. Might change, over time, if he "becomes" the man he was when I met him.
Duet 4-8 wondered about his age- yes, he's well past the "adult" age- he just turned 39.
Anyway, sorry to ramble, thanks, again for your support and encouragement. You're all doing a great job of helping others. I especially appreciate the persepctives of recovering addicts, because it really reinforces the belief that it CAN change, but it won't, on its own.