Thank you, Barbara52. I guess it all comes down to, if my brother had kept his job, this wouldn't even be an issue at all because he hasn't been any trouble since he's been here. I love my brother very much, and when he's not drinking, it's just like having a "regular" brother sharing your house.
He's quiet, goes to work, does his own thing...
It's just that we can't afford to carry anyone else financially. Our own budget is too tight.
I get all angry inside when he sits downstairs watching tv instead of being out job hunting, but I don't say anything to him because I don't know what my boundaries are as a sister. I'm not his landlord; I'm his sister. I'm not his mommy; I'm his sister.
I'm very confused about what my role is right now, and what I should or should not say to him. I try to stay out of his business and let him handle things, but I get all wound up inside, watching him be careless about his responsibilities.
I believe he WANTS a job. He just doesn't go about searching for one in the same way I would. I've always read that when you need a job, you are supposed to consider it your "job" to find one, putting in eight hours a day, every day, searching for one--not sitting in front of the television, checking the want ads, or looking online once in awhile, then more or less waiting for something to fall into your lap. But as his sister, I don't feel it's my place to keep nagging at him, to keep asking him when he's going to pay his rent, etc.
I don't know if I need to give him an ultimatum, such as pay your rent in full by the end of next month or you have to get out, or what. I feel like that's not giving him much of a chance. Him getting laid off at the temp job wasn't his fault. The guy he was replacing came back to work earlier than the company thought he would.
Plus, since I just told my brother last week that he could have until October before he had to leave here, wouldn't that be going back on my word to tell him that he has to get out right away?
Hard to know what to do, that's for sure...