OTL
Not snarky at all. I had no "implication" at all when I wrote those words.
I and my wife worked very hard to imbue our children with values and character. Very hard. There were years that made us feel like we'd failed, when our kids challenged and even disregarded what we'd taught. They experimented and "tried on" behaviors that didn't reflect what we'd taught.
That was typical teenage behavior. As they've grown into adults they have discovered the value in working hard, caring for others, and making the earth a better place. My ex and I consider ourselves very "lucky" more than responsible for this.
So many countless parents do the same and better than we did, only to have their children meet tragic consequences. You are 100% right. There are no guarantees. All you can do is your best. Rehab facilities and prisons are full of young people raised by wonderful and dedicated parents.
So, the only "point" I was trying to make is that when a parent does the best that they can, there comes a point when they have to let their young "fly" and hope for the best. Let them deal with their own problems, own their own success or failure. Too many parents, I think, take their children's failings as their own when nothing could be further from the truth. So, I think we are actually on the same exact page.
Sorry for any confusion I may have caused. My kids are my greatest source of gratitude-for being so lucky, not for being such a great parent.
warrens