mtnmagic
Not much to add...except perhaps to your comment about reaching out while it was happening.
I think perhaps you did. I think perhaps what you did outweighed anything you might have said. It is one of those scary moments when you offer someone the gift of honesty and you are left to wonder if it will end up in the dumptster.
Without consistency and honesty there can be no common ground in a relationship. I think both of you now know where things stand and what the "ground rules" are.That's "reaching out" to me.
warrens