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Old 03-17-2008, 06:22 PM
  # 12 (permalink)  
really_fed_up
Sister of Alcoholic
 
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Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: somewhere USA
Posts: 152
Welcome Karisma!

Your question: can he change? Answer--if and when he wants to. No amount of your own suffering or your own compromises to facilitate his choices will make him quit until he wants to quit. Set boundaries and stick with them. Easier said than done, I know, but maybe starting with what others have suggested--asking him not to drink in front of your children--would be a start.

I just read an amazing book on the subject of addicts in the family. It opened my eyes not only to the disease and what my sister is going through, but also what I've been doing that has enabled her to continue her behavior...and what I CAN do to stop enabling. It showed me what I'm learning here--that I am not responsible and nor can I control or cure the alcoholic--it lifted a huge weight off my chest when I learned that. The book's called Addict in the Family by Beverly Conyers. I highly recommend you read it, and in the meantime, keep posting!
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