Growing, that does help! It's always nice to know you're not alone.
I know the 12-steps. Have never "worked" them. I'm resisting but that doesn't mean I won't go to meetings. It all makes sense .... the steps but I chalk it up to me being a lazy. I'm not kidding. The steps are a lot of work. And then you have to feel stuff....deal with it. I like to sweep all that stuff under the rug. It's just what I do. May be after more and more meetings I'll get over myself!
Reading
Codependent No More is going to help tremendously, I know it.