My advice, you never give up the hope. You never give up on the person. You always wish and hope. This is a horrible disease. However, You do give up on how it effects you. Nothing changes when nothing changes. After all the definition of insanity is repeating the same patterns over and over again but expecting a new result each time. Your right, you need to get into a support group. You need to do what you need to do for you. He has made his choices. Yes you love him…you never stop. But you can stop with how everything falls on you. How are you responsible for his addiction? You can not control it and you in no way caused it. Those were his choices. The best thing you can do is work the steps and let go.
Telling family? Well, my honest opinion is you need people around you can talk to. If the shoe hits the fan and you gotta get away you want some where you can go and be safe. If you think you need to tell your family to “out” him my advice is you need to let go. He needs to tell them. He probably will not. If telling them makes you hurt more then I would be careful who I trusted and told. Family is like a coach on a side line. They are quick to offer advice but unless they are playing in the game they have no clue what you feel or what you need to do for you.
Keep posting. Everyone here is helpful. You have come to the right spot. Just stop beating yourself up over his addiction. For gosh sakes…you are not all the powerful that you made him do anything.
:praying
Hugs and Love,
Broken