Lexusgirl
I am so proud of you for going to look at another rental, now you're taking control, you go girl!!!!!!!!! As for him, very calmly set your boundaries. If you do not want him around you when he is drinking, state this to him very clearly. He can stay downstairs with the dogs, but also be very clear that he cannot bully them and abuse them while they are down there. If he does, then he can go upstairs of go sleep by his dad's, period. If you are calm and matter of fact about it, he will take you much more seriously, this I know for sure. As far as not reacting to him, react to us or journal, or take a walk,ANYTHING, just don't reward the behavior with a reaction to it unless you want more of the same, and I know you don't. Work on your paper, play with the dogs, or if you just can't stand being in the same space as him, go to an alanon meeting, and meet people that totally get what you are going through and can give you some tools to go through it more peacefully until you find your great new place. Also, the awareness you learn at the meetings will help you to not end up with another A and help you to figure out why you were with him in the first place, all things that will help you with a healthy fresh start. It is so clear that you are an awesome person that deserves so much better, go after the good stuff!!!!!!! Keep us posted, we care.