What will you do if she relapses and you find out, Andy? I don't ask to be confrontational. I am in a similar situation with my living-at-home son and I just wonder if you and your wife have a "plan". I have a feeling it is just a matter of time until my son falls again, if he isn't already? I am divorced and trying to figure this out on my own and it might be helpful to hear a man's plan. I do talk with my ex about it, but he is trying to recover from alcoholism and has no plan to take in his son. I really don't blame him. It's so tough!