I relate MrsFox...I felt the same way before I went to alanon. You are right about babysteps...Way to go!...but you may also feel some days that something just isn't quite right...have you tried journaling? If you don't feel ready to try alanon yet...how about the stickies and maybe reading Codependent No More by Melodie Beattie? I know, for me, it helped if I felt like I was taken some concrete action...no matter how large or small....posting here on SR is a great thing to do! Just my thoughts...