I'm sorry you are in pain, but I'm sure you know that if he is using there isn't a thing you can do about it. There isn't a worry in the world that will change it. Tears will only leave you with swollen eyes, but they won't wash away the fact that you are powerless over him, his choices and his addiction .. and if you are feeling pressure from what he does or doesn't do then I can honestly say then the weight of his addiction is on the wrong shoulders ... Please for your own sanity rather than cave in try and pull back, refocus and regroup... maybe get a good book and get lost in reading .. brush up on your own recovery ... Because he is using doesn't mean you have to go down too ... there are plenty of lifesavers to grab onto and one of them is SR .. When things get to be to much .. just float until you have gained the strength to dog paddle ...
******{hugs}}}}}
Passion