GiveLove,
Thank you for that. I see what you are saying, and it makes sense. About a year ago (when he was actually getting drunk every day) I did have a conversation like that, and he was receptive. He stopped going out and took up boxing and lost nearly 60 pounds, actually!
I have just noticed a couple of times in the last 6 months where it turns in to, "well, I can go for one drink, I need to get out of the house..." He works till 11 p.m. and says there is nothing else to do out of the house at that hour. I don't know, perhaps he just wants a different kind of lifestyle than I do...
At any rate, I found an ACOA AL-Anon meeting in my area that meets next week and I'm looking forward to trying that.
I'll post an update on how it went.