Hi joey,
You sound so much like me a few months ago now. I posted a thread around the 7th nov called "enough" and was were you are now. I have managed to be given another chance. Stick with it my friend and you will beco me that person you know you should be. I have a son of 7 years old and I felt the same way as you. I now have such a good time with him now on a weekend, I look back with shame at what I was like. It is a battle and the voices saying "go on have one" i know now is the addiction talking. Be strong Joey. You can do it.
regards:ghug3