hi geees,
thanks for your honesty. all stories help me recover.
maybe first things first, which might be your serenity. so much emotional chaos and reaction....you're losing that steady conscious contact with your HP. however you find that, i'd say triple your efforts.
i don't know anything about how life-threatening illness affects people. but since your wife is an addict, it is possible she could become compulsive as she attempts to save her life. an old friend of mine did this. it's difficult to be around, because one feels the presence of the addict.
they say that anger is a reaction to powerlessness, geees. a common emotion in addictive families. i hope you can make finding some peace and surrender a priority. it takes action and steadfast practice.
sending all good thoughts to you for a better day today.