Thank you, guys.
I fully agree Anvilhead, Karmakoma, and LucyA that there is really nothing wrong with someone calling B- sat night at all, it is just SO HARD to not respond the way I did with R- . The adaptive behaviors then (my gut knew he was up to ni good) are confusing now.
ICU, your response is exactly how I feel, it is hard to sort out "my gut" from fears from the past.
So far B-, SEEMS to be a truly good guy - I just don't know how to tell any of this apart.