spiritual malady
As has been mentioned previously, alcoholics experience craving and the mental obsession to keep going back to that which is causing trouble. When given a sufficient reason, the non alcoholic can stop and stay stopped, the external problems tend to straighten themselves out.
An alcoholic of my kind, does not get better when they put the drink down. In fact, I get worse, the closest I have ever come to pulling the trigger was when I was several months sober:dying of untreated alcoholism.
A spiritual malady I hear referred to often as the hole in the soul. I was never a problem drinker, I was a solution drinker, seeking ease and comfort. Restless, irritable, discontent, a prey to misery, unstable emotions, a feeling of uselessness. All manifestations of the spiritual malady.
Our basic text makes it clear, once the spiritual malady is overcome, we straighten out mentally and physically, I spent too much time putting the cart before the horse. Our founders knew from their cumulative experience exactly what they were talking about. My daily reprieve is contingent upon my spiritual condition. Steps 10-11 have taught me some disciplines to maintain this condition. My sobriety is a bi-product of this internal condition.