(((fierce)))
I am married 26 years to an alcoholic and am learning some things in this thread, you see, I alternate between denial and facing it head on. It is a confusing way to live. The scary thing in accepting it as fact is that then one has to act, or at least we think we do. It is possible to live with a functioning alcoholic for a life time but know that this disease is progressive. Those ups and downs of relative sobriety and downright drunkenness hurt no less having been through them repeatedly. It just gets more tiresome.
The key is taking care of you. Getting help and the support of new friends (Al Anon maybe) that know what you are talking about and you feel free to talk to without being judged. You can not control what he does.