Hi Limb,
I live in Colorado, where many hateful, exclusionary, even violent things have been done in the name of one religion or another. It always breaks my heart, and always surprises me. wwjd? This? I think not.
I understand your pain, but urge you to hang tightly onto your faith, onto your personal relationship with your HP. THAT is the important element here, imho. "Church" is simply a community of (supposedly) like-thinking believers, and its actions are based on the opinions and power of a few....which may or may not be what you personally believe in. But your relationship with your HP is loving and inclusive, and that is what matters.
I left my spiritual community and joined another that was more in line with my beliefs and my way of worshiping....and my compassion for all people. It was hard but necessary. I could not spiritually or financially support people who did what they did.
I'm sorry you're having to go through this, and very sorry for the individual involved.
Hugs,
GL