I can't tell you if you are an alcoholic, but you may be able to look at some things and figure it out for yourself. I suggest you get the Big Bood of Alcoholics Anonymous, and read it beginning with the Doctor's Opinion all the way through to pg 44. You should surely learn some more about what it truely means to be an alcoholic.
I feel you on being able to circumstanually controll your drinking. There were times in my life too where due to the company or the nature of me drinking I wasn't able to get totally **** canned. But, I wasn't enjoying that. I couldn't wait most of the time to geo do some enjoyable drinking, and that meant I wasn't watching or keeping track of how many I was drinking.
On pg 44 in the first paragraph it asks a two part question to qualify yourself, but it is definatly more benificial to ask yourself that question after reading the preceeding chapters.
Let me know if I can help you with any questions you might have as you try to figure this deal out for yourself.