welcome to S.R you are not alone ay more. we all have an addict in our life that is why we are here. we r here to support you through this. i am sorry it has happened. my addict is my son.do not feel ashamed by your husbands actions. the 3c's are, you did not CAUSE it,you can not CONTROL it & you can not CURE it. there is not anything you can do to keep him clean. read around,read the stickys at the top of the page. i hope your husband will go to meetings. i am a firm believer that they can not get clean after they have opened pandoras box without them.find an naranon or an alanon meeting for yourself.they help alot.learn to take care of yourself & please keep coming back here. sending prayers up for u & your husband.