Member,
I have to agree with LaTeeDa, he WILL NOT remain functioning forever, in fact when the deterioration really begins it isn't at the same pace that the last several years have been. It is like falling off a cliff at the end. It all just stops working!
I didn't read about this in a book, I am 8 years sober after having been a "functioning" alcoholic for almost 27 years. I never did lose the stuff, IE. Big house, cars, even my business. They all just were greatly diminished until at the end I had lost the respect of my 4 children. I lost my 2nd wife and most importantly I didn't even know who I was at the end. I was one of the lucky ones; I got desperate and finally went to AA, because I wanted to, not because everyone's long extended advice to go was heeded.
I know that you can't do anything to change him. Believe me; I really do know that only the alcoholic makes that life saving choice. You keep doing what you are, that is really the only choice that you have. You are welcome to use my words if you want, tell your hubby that HE WILL DIE, but that will be the good news. Before he does he will be unable to look at himself in the mirror and the despair that he is currently feeling will be magnified a thousand times over. There is NO SUCH THING as maintaining the status quo; it is all downhill from here.
My prayers are with you and yours, I happen to be celebrating my 55th birthday today, one that I would never have seen 8+ years ago if I had kept it up. I still have all the material stuff. My daughter called from New York today to tell me how much she loved me. She wouldn't speak to me 8 years ago. I have a wonderful woman in my life again, and I really LIKED WHO I SHAVED THIS MORNING!!
I would be happy to tell you’re AH this story if for any reason he wants to talk, however I doubt that will happen, but the offer is there.
Best wishes and be strong for yourself and your family.
Jon