HK,
Do you love what you're doing with your life right now?
Do you have any sort of mission in life....something you want to do with the gift of time you've been given here? Do you have a community of people who care deeply about you, other than "him" ?
I had an okay time grounding myself before I had these things. I had an EASY time doing it after I created them. "Busywork" to keep obsessive thoughts away is fine, but nowhere near as effective as "Dreamwork". Dreams and goals feed my soul, make me anxious to get out of bed in the morning and get my day started, because I'm doing things that have seized my heart.
Compared to that, I found, those obsessive whiny thoughts from my inner child couldn't even be heard. In fact, I found myself getting irritated whenever I slipped into self-destructive life- and time-wasting. There were people to help, turtles to save, books to write, health to be gained. Who dared interrupt that good and useful work with "Ohhhh, poor meeeeeee he doesn't loovvvvve meeeeeee" ??? What did it MATTER what he thought and did?
Sounds terrible, I'm sure. But it's not denial: I gave my inner kid plenty of time, love, and tenderness (years), and when I realized she was never going to stop whining, I finally said "Enough. I have to get on with my life now. I can't live in the past any more. You can come with me but you're going to have to stop the whining." Strangely, she smiled and shut up then.
Dreams are much bigger than how one of 7 billion people might feel about you. Surround yourself with loving, supportive people who admire your courage and spirit. You have so MUCH to admire...we all admire you!
Hugs,
GL