Somebody told me once that when I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired, I'll do something about it. My A has the same attitude about dinner with the child as yours does, and I have the same attitude that you do. I can also relate to the split persoanlity thing, too- I call the other personality "Cain". He knows about it, too, and sometimes (when he's sober" laughs at it, casue he knows he's wrong. The problem I think is here, though, is yours hasn't realized he's wrong yet. One of the biggest reasons I haven't followed through with throwing mine out is also because he's financially dependent on me for the most part, and he realyl doesn't have anywhere else to go. You and I are feeling more GUILT than LOVE. I think you're really lucky to have one of his friends agree with you, and be there for you; it would be worse if everyone else in his life thought there was nothing wrong with him. Keep on keeping on. If you feel strong enough to throw him out and mean it, do it. If not, it's OK, the time may come when you know you're sick and tired of being sick and tired. But if Saturday comes and he starts to drink or use, I would suggest you find something else to do without him. You're child-free for the night- enjoy it somehow!