(((Aquarian)))
Welcome!! I'm new to this site as well. I have been attending Alanon meetings and online forums for two years now and have found this program very helpful in restoring sanity to my home. My AH and I have not been together half as long as you guys have but we have gone through very similiar experiences. 6 months ago AH was drinking and using marijuana very heavily and was also using anti-anxiety meds (not prescribed to him) and were Benzo's. He clinically overdosed one night, took my van one morning at 4 am, wrecked the car next to us and crashed my van somewhere in town. I have no clue how he made it home alive, but for the grace of God he did without injuring himself or another human being. Going through this roller coaster for the last five years has been needless to say gut wrenching and heart breaking at times. (many times). This program helped me to detach emotionally from that huge incident and take care of business,myself, and my kids. The first thing I did was ask AH to leave. Basically that incident helped me realize what I would and wouldn't live with. I cannot live with active A'ism like that... relapsing one evening is one thing, actively using is entirely something else that I'm no longer willing to subject myself or my children too. AH has been sober six months yesterday... and yes he's going through a bit of that "dry drunkness" right now. He has returned to the home. I realized yesterday after posting something out that I needed to take a step back again emotionally. You will figure out what you can and can't live with. Maybe a face to face Alanon meeting would help... get some Alanon or AA literature.... keep posting and chatting with people who have had similiar experiences and through prayer and meditation you will figure out what is best for you. I wish you peace and serenity today.
ODAT~
Shaun