newcomer
Hi,
I've been reading posts for about a week and find them helpful.
My story: married 20 years, my ah stopped drinking in the first yr of marriage (his idea) and I was SO relieved. It lasted 10 years. He didn't do treatment or meetings. One day he thought he wanted to try drinking. He did it reasonably well for years.
Then bad crap started. Over a yr ago, I insisted to see a marriage shrink. The shrink we went to wasn't very knowledgeable about addictions (my opinion). He said we could try having my ah to do abstinence or try a 'behavior modification' experiement. I was hoping it could work. I like socializing and am not against drinking within reason. Of course the few experiements failed.
Six weeks ago, the crap hit the fan when ah mixed pain relievers, sake bombers and drove! Then disappeared for awhile. He's never acted like that before, so I was ready to call the marriage quits.
He realized how serious I was, felt extremely sad and mad at himself. We decided to talk and try to work it out. He acted dedicated and went to AA meetings. He seemed to get good stuff from them. Then he stopped.
Then I got mad and felt he's not willing to heal then why the hell should I stay involved?? He said I am nagging. I fear he will just be a dry drunk if he doesn't dedicated himself. If he never really gets better or if he never gets enthusiatic with life, I wonder if I can live with it.
I am very into being happy and healthy. I feel if/when I have a medical, emotional or any type of problem I deal with it head on. I feel it's only fair to be as good of a partner as you can.
Anyways, thanks for letting me talk. You are all helpful and I am glad I found this site.
Aquarian