Well, today is the day.
For the last week my ah and I have hardly spoke. I have been nice and he has stayed distant but not angry. We go to our first couples counceling today. It will be nice to get validated by someone else in front of him. Maybe then he will see what he is doing to me and to us. Not saying thats going to fix things and we will be all better. It may be what leads us to divorce. I don't know, I just know I will be holding my ground. If he drinks then I must leave the relationship. I know I'm right and even if the counceler were to say other wise (I know she wont) I know I can't live like this and don't want to any longer.
If he wants to think it's about me controling him, then fine. Let him think that, BUT DON'T DRINK! I am done crying and saying (IF YOU LOVED ME) (WHY DO YOU DO THIS TO ME) I am done being a victome. It's time for me to stand up for my self and I am ready! Today is my day!
Today, what is most important is me. My happyness, my sanity. I want my joy back! If he wants his beer then fine. He can have the beer and I will have the joy. Pray for me, pray that I don't back down and wither like a weed in the desert. Right here and right now I feel stronger than anyone but I know me..... I can change with the wind.
D