I stick with BigSis's definition, with a little room to wiggle if I just feel like doing a favor.
But to be honest, not enabling does not insure a change of behavior either. If your worry is that you are doing it "right" so that he will stop, you may be worrying about the wrong side of this. What you do or don't do may not make a bit of difference in whether he chooses to use. Yes, making it easier often allows them to continue in comfort, but stopping doesn't make them stop. It just makes using a little less comfy. And not enabling is not meant to be punishment.
Are YOU comfortable with him seeing the kids, stopping by to get clothes etc?
If you are, with no expectations (and thats my tough spot), then maybe spend some time thinking about your options down the road, and let today be today.
(((Hugs)))
Cece